"It's never too late to become what you might have been."
- George Eliot
I have dreams! I keep them tucked so far away that I even have a hard time hearing them when they struggle to make their way to the surface. I believe I have been doing this as long as I can remember. For most of my life (teen and adult years), I have weighed my dreams against my feeling of inadequacy and fear that they might actually come true. So I buried them with distractions. Silly thing is that I didn't see that my dreams and aspirations are a part of me and by burying them, I also managed to conceal myself. I am almost 44 and I am not really sure who I am. Well maybe I have more of an inclination than I want to let on. I have distracted myself with stories, work, and tears. Placated my dreams with lies that one day I would be strong enough to let them emerge. There is this child within me. One that wants to play with my dreams. Wants to be creative and wants to see what will be. The tired me, the one that gives way to distractions as a means to quite the child with her dreams, wants so much to let it all come to the surface. I can't contain it any longer. I was driving home last night and thinking how 44 years isn't really a long time. If I break it up into quarters, each one would represent 11 years. I can connect with my 11 year old, my 22 year old, and my 33 year old. Each representation of myself spent too much time in a graveyard of self doubt, believing that their inadequacies meant mourning the loss of their dreams. But it's not too late. The 44 year old can make way for the 55 year old to reflect on how amazing it is to follow a dream, plan for success, and through it all find a better understanding of self. My journey begins today. I am ready to stumble along the way!